Epicurean Mosquitoes, Stolen Hammer, etc...

It's been almost two weeks since I came back to Trivandrum. The settling down process has so far been without any major hitches, though the broken toilet seat and other such issues are still being addressed. In the meantime, I made a short trip to Palghat to attend a wedding.

I was travelling by train in India after almost six years. Six years ago, my wife and I, along with a few friends, travelled 2nd class to Goa. My wife survived her first third-world train trip and even went on to have chicken biriyani from Kannur railway station. This time around, we moved up a few levels into an air-conditioned coach. The word air-conditioning doesn't apply here in the original sense, as what it actually does is freeze the place to hell. There are no visible controls or switches. Nobody knows how the thing works. I saw what looked like a prehistoric control panel where the needle showing the temperature and pressure was swinging around like the speedometer in a racing car.

Inside the train I almost felt like I was back in Kitami, standing outside in a T-shirt in the winter months, when the temperature touches minus 24 °C. Still, even in these extreme conditions there was one living being that went about with a song in its lips. The mosquito, "mosquee-chan", our national bird! It seems like there is no escaping it. There is a big chikungunia* (pronounced as Chicken Gunia, or at least that's how it is pronounced here in Trivandrum) epidemic in the country, which the governments (states as well as central) have promptly neglected. This is a terrible disease and is spread by mosquitoes.

One thing about the mosquito is that it has evolved with the times. After living in air-conditioned environs, etc., they have now evolved into a gourmet of sorts. Usually, you see only flies sitting on food but during my trip to Palghat, for the first time in my life, I saw mosquitoes enjoying food. We were at this restaurant, in the evening, having just ordered some idiappams and uthappam, when we saw this swarm of mosquitoes zeroing in on us. My wife immediately got her anti-mosquito battle gear out - sprays, patches, creams, a thick rubber band like thing that goes around the ankle, the whole works. The waiter got a mosquito repellent coil and lit it. The mosquitoes; they just watched all this with curiosity and went about biting everyone. In due course, the dishes arrived, and lo, the mosquitoes were nibbling at the idiappam and stew and at the onion uthappa and sambar with relish. Was it their dessert after the blood binge? We could only watch in awe at the evolution of this insect into a living being of a higher order, enjoying delicacies in air-conditioned ambience. Here we have immaculate proof of evolution to show the guys in Kansas teaching biblical creationism.

Well, the trip back was uneventful for the most part, except for "The Mystery of the Missing Hammer". I felt like Sherlock Holmes for a brief moment. The only thing missing was a dead body. I have the picture below. Look at that red outline of the hammer, like the ones you see around where a dead body was in a crime scene. Whoever stole it did it without breaking anything. Good job!

It says "hammer for breaking the window glass...". If only the hammer was there, I could've tried breaking a few windows

* "Chikungunia? You don't have mutton gunia?" was my initial reaction. But, no jokes this. If you're travelling to India (or even if you're in India and yet to be stricken by this virus), beware of mosquito bites. This is a real epidemic though the government is in a state of denial. And, there is no treatment available. It reached Kerala's coastal areas a few months ago from Tamil Nadu and even in my neighbourhood almost every household is affected. The viral fever goes away in a couple of days but you'll be left with severe arthritic-type pain in the joints, especially debilitating in the case of old people. The pain is supposed to go away in about three months, which is the cure offered by medical science. Do nothing and suffer for three months! In my view, there is not much harm in drinking donkey's milk, a cure offered in Tamil Nadu by quacks. Best thing, however, is to stitch a mosquito net to cover yourself from head to toe and walk inside that.

P.S. As you can see, I did get my Internet connection up. It had the potential of a big story when the guy at the counter told me I'd have to wait two months, unless I meet someone higher up. Well, I knew someone who knew someone kind of thing and got the connection in two days. Only in India. Also known as "sarkar karyam mura pole" in Malayalam, which could be roughly translated as "the government works in mysterious ways".