What has slave trading got to do with the Olympics? This has been my pet idea for a long time now. But before that, let’s take a look at the events in Sydney and how the Japanese media report it.
I read something about the state-controlled Chinese media repeatedly showing only their athletes winning medals and crying and hugging and kissing and doing all those things medal winners do. Well, that's bad, but what more can you expect from the commie-scumbags. Now, let's take a look at the free-market, capitalistic dirt-bags in Japan. Everything was free and fair, but the market decided that you need to see only the 18 medals the Japanese won plus the umpteen others they lost very closely by finishing 8th in the semi-finals or something like that. These have to be repeatedly shown every hour for days together.
Then they show all those teary-eyed viewers thanking all these athletes for the "kandou" they provided. “Kandou” can be roughly translated as constipated emotion. Didn't get it? Here's a better analogy. Many of you must be familiar with those baby Shalini movies with Mammooty as her Dad, where she has cancer and Mammooty has piles and people, especially women, in the movie theatre get all choked up and then cry and throw up like those North Koreans at the Great Leader's funeral. That is what is called as "Kandou" in Japanese. After marathon running, this is the most favourite national pastime here. Anyway, the press and electronic media here behave worse than the state-controlled Chinese media. I don't know how Indian coverage was, but the large number of medals our athletes regularly don't win makes it easier for them to show other country's performances.
That brings me back to the despised practice of slavery mentioned earlier. Look at the athletes winning all those medals for America, Cuba, Bahamas, Jamaica, Brazil, France, and Netherlands. (Look at all those athletes winning medals for Kenya, Nigeria, Ethiopia etc). They're all of African origin and a lot of them ended up in these countries due to the slave trades of yester years. Some of them were recently pulled over by the rich countries with lures of economic security, like Wilson Kipketer of Denmark. This has big clues and pointers as to what India should do as part of their future Olympic preparations.
*Being a rich or poor country doesn't matter. You need people of African origin. We've to stop paying money to these criminal cricketers and use it to sponsor some good African athlete. Already a lot of them come to India for studies. How many white, yellow or brown people do you see running or winning the 100 metres dash?
*Having black athletes need not necessarily mean a medal. For that you need doping. Institutionalise drugs. Let there be a level playing field. There is a catch here. We don't have the latest drugs the rich countries have. So either we've to steal the technology or we've to get in cahoots with drug smugglers (they can diversify) in Pak, Afghan and Bombay. How many white, yellow or brown athletes on drugs win a 100 metres dash? Zero. Zilch. Black athletes on drugs. That’s the need of the hour.
*Rich white countries need some medals. So we can let them retain stuff like gymnastics, swimming etc. However we should lobby for the removal of pseudo-sports like synchronous swimming and diving, rhythmic gymnastics, horsing around in a horse et al. Anything with music in it should be out.
*For the pseudo-sports mentioned above and the new porno-sports like beach volleyball we can have a parallel Olympics 'Parallelympics' (on the line of Paralympics). In fact beach volleyball could be made interesting if they have categories based on bust size like the weight categories in boxing etc., Don't know what they'll do for men, but who cares. I didn't see any TV station showing men's beach volleyball.
In the meantime, like all Indians who must have supported Eric - the Eel - Moussambani from Equatorial Guinea and who totally agrees with Baron Pierre de Coubertin's ideal of 'taking part', let's look forward to more Olympics where the Indian team troops into the stadium with trendy ethnic headgears like in a fashion show.

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